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unclefather:

humans are so cute, when we say goodbye we put our arms around each other and to show we love someone we bring them flowers. we suck the cum out of peoples dicks like a gogurt. we say hello by holding each other’s hand, and sometimes tiny little dewdrops form in our eyes. for pleasure we listen to arrangements of sounds, press our lips together, smoke dried leaves, get drunk off of old fruit. we’re all just little animals, falling in love and having breakfast beneath billions of stars

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unclefather:

me: i need to show you something

matt: what?

me: *slowly pulls my nipple out of my shirt*

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unfollower:

tips for college:

  • no 1 cares if you eat alone in the dining hall
  • dont be scared of upperclassmen they dont care
  • dont raise your hand to go to the bathroom 
  • dont bring a handwritten sick note from ur mom
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